


Flower Power

by chubissa



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternative Universe: 60's, Angst, Daddy Issues, Drug Use, Drugs, Hippies, I'm a soppy mess, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, POV First Person, Vietnam War, no zombies
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-28
Updated: 2017-02-28
Packaged: 2018-09-27 12:34:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10020989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chubissa/pseuds/chubissa
Summary: Daryl finally has enough of dealing with his father and decides to leave him once for all. So does the city boy named Paul - or Jesus, as they call him now.And they have a lot to learn from each other, that is, if bad first impressions can be overcome.





	

1968

“So long, ya’ prick!” I yell, slamming the door of the car shut and pressing all the way down on the accelerator while pa’s still calling after me from the front door, the son of a bitch.

I knock the mail box down on my way out of the property – if you could call that fucked up, dented all over thing that Merle hits every time he passes by with his truck,  a mail box – and the tires spit clouds of dirt as they run, making impossible to see a thing from the review mirror.

It’s not like I’m looking back, anyway.

I’ve been thinking about moving out for a time now, but him selling mom’s stuff to pay his drinking debt? That was the last straw.

A glass jewelry box, a small pair of diamond earrings, an empty fancy bottle of perfume and a fine silk shawl that had some golden embroidery on it was all I had from her. That’s all I’ve ever known about my mom, all the memories I made up about her-   _Fuck, my eyes are stinging._

I change the gear and press harder on the road.

How could he do that? Fucking heartless bastard.

He never loved her.

_If Merle was here, he wouldn’t let that happen…_

 Well, he wasn’t.

 Anger rushes through me, my knuckles turning white on the steering wheel. _He never is_.

The bag on my side falls from the passenger seat when I come to a sudden stop at a crossroad. It’s mostly empty, only two changes of clothes or so, some money I’ve been saving – not much at all - and a toothbrush. That was all I could think during the rage fit I was having after pa told me what he had done.

Think I can pay some cheap motel for a week, tops. That should be enough to find a job in the city, I can work my way around. This Jimmy guy, I know he has a mechanic shop somewhere near the principal avenue – his brother used to hunt with us. Maybe he remembers me; make a favor for an old friend, right?

Maybe I’m fooling myself. Shit’s getting harder these days for nobodies like me, I was lucky enough not to be sent to the other side of the world. Ain’t dying for no man sitting behind a desk, fuck that.

Merle liked the idea, though. He was all about serving this great country and the wonders of the job. Shithead only forgot his criminal record; they’ve never let him join in.

Hell, if it wasn’t for pa I could live a nice life around here and never bother with a thing-

Hold on, what’s that?

There’s some cars and some _vans?_ parked at the side of the road. Hm, that’s new.

No one usually comes this deep in the woods – the dirt road probably won’t even handle this traffic.

I slow down the car, trying to see what’s going on. Looking around, I can see a big crooked tree stand out on my left. This is Steve’s property, I recognize.

On my right side, there’s a large clearing, with neatly trimmed grass where families do picnics on the weekend, but that’s all.

Now the place is filled with thousands of people, I watch from my passenger’s window.

“Holy shit...” murmuring to myself, I look around. There’s a spot in front of a baby blue Kombi that’s decorated with colorful stickers, so I park there, curiosity getting the best of me.

Never seen something like this.

I get out of the car and notice there’s two more vehicles coming down the road, and by the looks of them –a purple truck with people sitting on the hood, wearing the weirdest things I’ve ever seen and some rainbow colored bike waving the flag of some country I don’t know – I can tell they are part of this same show.

_What the hell…_

I study them turning and entering the clearing. Now that I’m outside I can hear some music in the distance, I don’t recognize it, though…

Mimicking their moves, I adjust my winged vest and cross the road, trying to blend in with the flow of people that are entering the place.

“Dear lord” there must thousands and thousands of people in here, much more than I thought from the outside. At the top of this “entrance” a giant flag of a tiger was put up, you can read the word _Shiva_ underneath it, whatever that means…

Standing on the tip of my toes, I can see a stage way back on the field, next to the limits of the woods. There’s people coming out and getting in from all places. 

People start staring at me.

Oh, I see.

I’m really standing out in these clothes, I notice, looking down at myself.

So I try to get some cover under the shadows of the trees on my left, here where there aren’t much people around.

_Alright, what in heavens name is this…?_

A group of topless girls passes near my hiding spot. Their long hair decorated with camp flowers shining in the sun, going way down their naked backs. They’re wearing loose, colorful pants, and I can peek over their underwear. Holding hands and skipping steps, they pass right by me, singing along the song that was being played at the stage.

What is this place? What’s going on?

There’s so many stuff to look at I feel a little overwhelmed.  A guy wearing only a vest with a swirling pattern is dancing, I believe, but  in a way I’ve never seen.

A bit far from this, two guys wearing women’s hats are engaged in almost a sexual act with some girl, who has a scarf tied around her forehead and it’s wearing the most shimmering skirt in the world. _Wow._

And they’re not the only ones; there are lots of open displays of affection around me, and lots of _dancing_ that I’m pretty sure it must be illegal…

What’s all this about?

There’s some movements behind me, I sense it, and when turn to the forest, I can see some tents placed here and there – and also some being placed.

“No, not your left, my left!” a short Asian girl is directing two other guys who are trying to move some kind of sign. She has her jet black hair parted in two extremely long braids, and she’s using some peculiar clothing, like the rest of everyone in here. With her hands on her hips, she must’ve noticed I was standing there. She turns and just as I thought I was going to get scold over, she comes up to me “You lost, sugar?” _sugar?_

I look down at her, studying her bossy posture.

“I was jus’ on ma way out, miss” tipping my head, I move to leave. Enough of this weird shit already, better leave before I get in trouble.

“Oh no, please, stay… Correct me if I’m mistaken, but you seem to be new here” she curiously ogles me up and down, corner of her lip quirked up and a mischievous look on her face.  I take a step back.

“I… I’ve-”

Before I can come up with something, she leaps forward, grabbing me by the upper arm and pulling me up to her  – I assume – friends that were putting up that sign.

“Boys, you won’t believe what I have here!” enthusiastically, she drags me up to them. I know, I could just pull off and run, but I’m kind of curious to see where this is heading now. We’re close to the guys she was talking earlier and I can read the sign from this distance, it’s a “silence, please” type of sign. Well, it makes sense, considering all the tents scattered around the trees. I analyze the surroundings one more time, making sure there’s an escape route in case things get bad… just old habits, you know.

“Barbra, leave the poor guy alone…” one of them starts.

“Oh, shush! Don’t ruin the mood” she let’s go of me “Can’t you see all the potential? A virgin, who has no idea-” her friend is shaking his head “No, hear me out; a blind man who has never seen the color of-”

“That’s quite enough, Barbra” the guy that has been silent during the conversation – guy? More like a man with a beard like that – speaks up “Why don’t you let him say what he wants, hm?” he turns to me, putting the sign he was helping to hold down “What do you want, kiddo? Enlightenment? Review your views on politics?... Find some pretty gals? Dance?” and lower, he adds “Some heavy stuff…?”

I shift my position uncomfortable.

“Look, man, I was jus’ drivin’ by, saw some action from the outside and decided to check what was goin’ on, tha’s all”

“Ha... Well, what you think?”

“Sorry?”

“Like what you see?” the other guy pipes in.

“Uhm… Yeah, ‘guess so” they don’t seem like bad people.  And if they were, saying I didn’t sound like a not really good idea.  A little Asian girl, a tall skinny blond boy who must be on his twenty’s and this guy who looks a lot like those crazy scientists you see in the movies… Thinking again, I’m not sure how much damage they can make.

“Good, that’s good. That’s a start”. _Hmpf, whatever that means_.

“So… what exactly is goin’ on down here?” I ask, since I’m already on this position, anyway.

This time the girl – Barbra, I believe – answers, big grin on her face.

“Not much, just the best time of your life” I look back to the guys but they have the same expression as her “Freedom, that’s what’s happening here. You can be whoever you want and you can do whatever you want, as long no one gets hurt, of course. We’re all about peace and love, sugar” that sounds… interesting. I have to admit, she got my attention.

“There’s music too, as you can see” the skinny boy comments “You like music?” I give a short nod.

“Where trying to build something here. A community” The crazy cientist looking man explains “And this…” He gestures to the sea of people behind us “Is happening all over the country. It’s not just a dream, a delusion, as they like to say, no, this is real. Real life people who are tired of lies, of rules, of burocracy… Of war” he gravely adds.

“Yeah, society sucks” Barbra proclaims.

The old man huffs a laugh.

“Well, that’s one way to put it. Shortly, but, nevertheless, truthful” he agrees “So, you - what’s your name, by the way?”

Watching him through my lowered gaze, my mind processes the possibilities I have. Checking once more to see if the escaping route is still there, just to be safe, I look back at the man in front of me.

“Daryl” I drawl it out, defiantly.

“Daryl” he repeats, amusement on his features “I’m Andy, this is Corporal Crazy “he gestures to the boy at his side who militarily salutes me “…and that little sassy thing is Barbra”

“Peace, brother” she raises a “v” sign for me with her fingers.

“So, Daryl, why don’t we show you around the place? Hm? Maybe you’ll like it more than you think-“

“Hey, Andy, where do we put the fireworks?” a random guys calls from a distance behind us.

“Oh, godammit, do we have to run over everything again? I told you, behind the stage, on the station-“

“Yeah, yeah, I know, but the guy says it won’t fit all in there. He’s outside waiting on the truck, if you want to talk him”

“…. Gotta deal with this f…” he flusters “Crazy, Barbra, show him around” he storms out of there “Now what did I tell you, Mike, you…-”

Barbra rolls her eyes, crossing her arms.

“I swear, sometimes he’s just like my boss” she exchanges a look with the skinny boy.

There’s something about this place and this people that… I can’t bring myself to name it.

“…. ya’ guys have fireworks?”

My question takes the two by surprise. Barbra is quick to conceal that, and engages on an enthusiastic speech.

“Yes, we do! C’mon, we’ll show you the place” motioning for me follow, she starts to make her way out of the woods “We have fireworks, we have circus performers, all kinds of art performances you can imagine - they won’t make much sense, however, for an…erm, outsider” leading the way, with the Crazy guy behind her, she points to the places where each thing happens “Over there, there’s a food stand too, all natural products” we make our way between the groups of people that are standing here, in the early of the afternoon, scalding sun over their heads on this giant open field and who seem to have never been happier.  The muffled sounds of the band on the stage tell me it’s something really amateur – even though I’m not an expert on the subject, by any means.

This is insane, is all I can keep thinking as Barbra rambles.

A girl dancing with ribbon wands calls my attention on the corner of my eye. There’s a small audience seated on the grass around her, watching. That’s definitely not any waltz. Nothing like that old-fashioned thing they do down at Joe’s bar on Friday nights, no, this looks like fucking magic.

The way she spins and tosses those ribbons only to catch them back seamless, it’s… it’s unreal.

She’s wearing a body suit, like the ones you should wear at the beach, but, it’s fantastic, you can see every movement of every muscle on her legs, and, damn, why don’t people wear these when dancing? It makes so much more entertaining. It’s hypnotizing.

This place seems to have come out of a very wild dream.

I probably should’ve left already… You know what they say, curiosity killed the cat and everything…

Can’t help it, though. It feels as a breath of fresh air to me. Looking around for a bit can’t do much harm now, can it?

It’s not like I have somewhere to go back to.

“… it is much more than a political statement. It’s a way of life. As Andy said, we only want to be free” she stops and turns to me. I’m still watching the ribbon ballerina “Daryl, you can be free here. Free yourself from the shackles of moralism and religion, I promise it will be the best experience of your life”

It might not seem like it, but her words get me good. Never heard of such things. It does sound like some bullshit at first, yet…

Why then would so many people be here?

“We should go help Andy before he has the chance to get mad at us” Corporal Crazy tells Barbra.

“Uh, right” she reluctantly agrees “Daryl, feel free to explore the place. You’re welcome to stay, if you want to”

“….’kay” eyes still lost on all the things going all, I’m only half listening.

“- he’s really quiet” It’s all I hear before Barbra voice fades away in the crowd.

The music stops and a thunder of claps and praises erupt from the audience.

There’s two guys swaying in a slow dance at my left, and they don’t stop to clap, one wearing a gipsy like clothing and the other one wearing a white leather vest, kind of like mine, only more… flashy. They seem to be lost in their own world.

Shit, I shouldn’t be staring.

The gipsy one holds the other one face in his hands, and I try to look away, I swear I do, aware of what was coming but-

What-

They kiss.

They really did, believe me. Out here in the open, just like that.

Jesus Christ, what’s wrong with these folks?

I fidget with my hands, nervously wanting some distraction. Hell, it seems like I’m the only one noticing what’s happening.

The new band gets introduced.

My eyes accidentally fall on the odd pair again, and shit, they’re still going-!

Goddamit!

I turn around, only to be greeted by two full blown women holding hands and-  dear lord, this is-

Kind disoriented, I start moving in no specific direction.

Someone bumps into me.

“Watch were ya’ goin’, dumbass” I snap, rotating my arm to get away from the touch as if had burned me.

“Wow, take it easy, cowboy” the man – boy? – that stumbled on me has his hands raised and a curious smirk on his lips when my eyes meet him.

He doesn’t look any different from anyone in here; long light brown hair passing his shoulders, bushy beard that makes it hard to tell how old he is… There’s something on that smug expression that only makes me want to punch him.

Oh, he’s shirtless too, naked torso showing some lean muscles and a tattoo on his pectoral, but I doubt he’s in the navy. Some sparse hair trails down his chest to the edge of his industrial jeans – and I would say something about it if I wasn’t wearing one myself.

At least I don’t wear mine that low.

And let’s not forget the purple lavender flower tucked behind his ear. _Pompous prick._

“Shit, man. No need to get all worked up” he holds my gaze, not backing off “Chill, alright? Just wanted a lighter, don’t mean no trouble”

I already hate this jerk, acting all… damn, what was the word?

“… you look like you smoke… right?”

Ah, yeah.

_Condescending._

I huff.

“… I don’t mess with yer kind, boy” muttering behind sealed lips, I start looking around for the exit.

“… My kind?” don’t know why he has this incredulous look on his face; if Merle was here he would say much more worse things “You better look at where you’re at, mister” that fucking amused smirk is still there

“Good thing I’m on my way out, then”

“Yeah…” he looks me up and down the same way that ankle biter did before “Good thing...” the little shit has the nerve to purposely bump my shoulder as he passes by me, making anger boil deep in me. Talking about Barbra, here she comes back, dissolving the bad thoughts I was having.

“Here you are – excuse me - thought we lost you – ops, sorry!” she’s smiling, skimming between the people. Finally reaching me, she wipes the sweat of her forehead and sighs “Seemed you and Jesus were having a little… altercation”

Looking behind me, I can only catch of glimpse of the brownish hair before it disappears.

“Kind of” returning to Barbra, she has an apologetic smile on her face.

“He’s…. He’s something, I tell you” she shakes her head “You may also know him as the son in Rovia & Sons, you know? The big ol’ company?”

“Never heard of”

“Oh, well” she makes a dismissive gesture with her hand “Anyway, that’s not what I came back to talk about… Couldn’t find Andy, so…Why don’t you follow me, you seem like you need to cut some slack, know what I mean?” she punctuates the words with a wiggle of eyebrows.

“… no”

“Just follow me, Darrrryl” oh God, why is she purring?

-

She’s taking me to her tent, that much I can tell, as we strode back to the limit of the forest.

_Fuck, I should have left when I could._

“Wait here” she gets down and enters a green tent set beside a lot of other green tents…

“Barbra, I –“ but she’s already getting out

“Open your mouth” launching herself over me, I try to push her off, not understanding.

“What- “ she takes the opportunity to shove something inside my mouth.

It tastes like hard candy.

Like those that come on the tins, you know? I loved those things, I remember I used to collect the little tins when I was a kid, until Merle found out-

But it’s not hard candy, because it has already melted on my tongue.

“What is it?” wait, did she just drugged me?

She spins me around and encouragingly pats me on the back.

“Go on now, have some fun!” I’m forced to take a step forward.

“Barbra-” I look over my shoulder, but she just waves at me “What you-”

“Go on, Daryl! Dance, drink, do whatever you want! I’ll be back here if you need me”

Dancing?

I’m getting the hell out of here.

Whatever that was, I’m sure a little candy like that can’t do much for a twenty six year old that weighs one hundred ninety pounds like me. Always been tough for booze; that must mean something.

 Damn, this place is getting fuller by the minute!

“Ouch!”

“Sorry, ma’am” I’m making my way to the exit, though it’s hard and it’ll probably take some good thirty minutes until I reach there… 

-

Fuck, the exit didn’t seem that far away before.

-

I look up, searching for that entrance sign and I swear to God the tiger is freaking moving. It’s waving, which is funny, because I could swear it was made of a solid material.

-

Okay, you won’t believe me.

But there’s this singer on the stage right now and I swear he has to be an angel on earth – and you know that means something coming from me. I’ve never heard any voice like that, it’s not possible that he’s a regular human being.

Christ, it’s so beautiful that my eyes tear up and I don’t think I’ve never used the word beautiful before, to be honest.

“Are you hearing this?” some stranger at my side asks me. Wiping the tears away, I nod.

It touches me so _so_ fucking deep, that this overwhelming warmth just won’t fade away.

_Christ._

-

The maniac laugh that escapes me doesn’t sound anything natural. My heart is beating like a drum on my chest, and I feel like I could run a mile…

_Hah!_

As a matter of fact, I might just do that.

Another breathless laugh.

 _I could do anything_ , I think, running my hands over my sweaty hair. I feel shiver all over. Delicious, electric shivers.

_I could do any fucking thing._

_Haha!_

-

Need to sit, lay down, something… something…

My back hits a hard surface, I can’t tell what it is and my neck is not obeying any commands, so I bring my hands back and seek some support in there, feeling a scratchy and circular shape… How I ended up here on the forest again?

Every time I blink the scenario in front of me changes and, not like before, it’s not pleasant, I can’t get a grasp of what is happening around me… The overwhelming sensation is now too much and panic is adding up too.

It’s as if I’m being cornered,  some pressure is building on my shoulders, just like my neck, and moving gets difficult, shit, breathing too…

My knees hit the ground and the shock of it sends a wave of pain that makes me only clench my teeth, because that’s all the control I have of my body.  I can only watch the legs walking around me.

“Stop” I mutter, I think “Stop” or maybe I’m just thinking.

Why is it not stopping?

“Stop” and this time the sob that escapes me tells me I’m indeed speaking out loud.

“Hey, hey…” I sense someone kneeling in front of me and I muster all the control I have to back away when the stranger grips my shoulder. But that only makes me land on my ass and hit my head against the tree. This person stops more damage from happening by holding me up straight by the armpits “Easy, easy-” my head falls. All I’m able to do is sit there with the tears falling down my face. _What the fuck is this place…_

 “-… breathing, it’ll help you” can’t really understand what he’s saying, though I can tell it’s something soothing, he doesn’t sound like a threat.

“need ta’ leave” I manage to say, still not able of holding my head straight.

“Alright, okay” he complies “Where… where do you want to go?”

“Ma’ car” hell, my tongue feels ten times bigger “Ma’ car is out- side-…”

“Alright, I can take you there” he lifts my chin up to look at him and

Oh, fuck

It’s that fucking dude-!

“Shit, you can’t drive like this, cat” he clicks his tongue and looks around, thoughtful. Great, I can’t even tell him to fuck off. His eyes fall on me again. “Where do you live?”

I can shake my head, though. It makes me lose my balance but then I’m remembered of the hands firmly tucked under my arms, which don’t let me fall.

“City” I spit out, head falling again.

“What, I-”

“City!” grunting, I search for some leverage, holding his arms with a desperate grip. Can’t really make out his expression, the only thing standing out being his furrowed brows. The rest of his face is melting.

“Okay, then. City” he agrees, voice still soft “I can take you there”

There’s not much arguing to do about. Watching him with defiant eyes, I let go of his arms, and he takes that as a yes.

“Where’s your car?”

-

“ _Humpf_ … Godamn, you’re heavy” he throws me on the passenger seat. Slamming the door, he makes his way to the other side buy jumping over the hood. If I wasn’t so fucked, he would be getting a broken nose for that.

Hell, if I wasn’t so fucked up, this whole situation wouldn’t be happening!

I shrink next to the window, humiliation making me close my eyes.

He gets in and uncaringly slams the door again.

“Keys in the ignition” I tell him, voice groggy but a little clearer than before. That’s a good sign.

It should be, it’s already darkening outside. Whatever it was it should be passing by now…

The engines roar makes me sick to the stomach, for whatever reason.

“Okay, to the city… Here we go” he starts maneuvering our way out of there.

_Just be over, just be over, just be over_

“So… first bad trip, huh?”

_Not this, please_

The only answer I give is the slight annoyed bang of my head against the window.

“Here, think it’ll help if I roll down my window? Some chilly wind might help”

What his dude expects me to say? Did he forget that we met earlier?

I can feel him analyzing me… He clears his throat, shifting on the leather seat.

“Where… Where are you staying at the city?” he tries again.

If I don’t say something this won’t stop.

_Godamn._

I take a deep, shaky breath before talking.

“…don’t know” My brain is regaining control over some basic functions, that’s good. The sweat on my body is turning cold too, so I cross my arms over chest, seeking for warmth.

“What” he snorts a laugh “What do you mean you don’t know?”

Silence.

He rolls down his window, struggling to spin the rusty tool.

“It will make you feel better, trust me” he promises, long hair now blowing all over the place, and if I turn to watch it, that’s nobody business but mine.

_Why do you wear it like a girl?_

Big bushy beard, like some fucking intellectual… He doesn’t seem like one.

And, oh shit,

What’s up with those eyes? Reflecting the headlights like fucking mirrors, large, round, bug eyes. Unknown, completely new.

He’s still shirtless, his skin making sticky sounds every time he moves against the leather seat that spend all day exposed to the sun.

I say all day because the moon it’s already  up high in the sky, stars shining brightly in a way only the country side can offer.

_Damn, I’ll miss this in the city._

The open window doesn’t make me feel better; in fact, it makes my skin rise with goosebumps from the cold… Not telling him to close, though.

Not telling him anything.

I better remember that.

Not telling him anything.

“Feeling better?” he asks after a while, voice tender that makes me instantly recoil. I hold the “I’m fine” on the tip of my tongue.

Jesus – fuck, can’t call him this - clicks his tongue

“See, since I’m giving your sorry ass a free ride the least you could do is talk to me” he spins the steering wheel with one hand while the other gesticulates “Not even a talk, if that’s too much, just answer when you’re questioned”

God, he sounds like pa.

“Or are you really that wasted?” he side eyes me with concern at the same time I was watching him driving. Immediately turning back to my window, I’m too affected to say anything.

Not because of the drug, however. Everything has stopped moving and I can feel the floor beneath my feet. That’s not it.

_It’s just… It’s just that…_

_What is this person?_

Then, quietly suggesting: “Or is it because you don’t talk to _my kind_?”, eyes focused solely on the road.

He laughs and I have to look at him to see what the joke is because I clearly missed it. Son of a bitch is laughing at me? Hell, he better-

“Sorry, it’s-“ he shakes his head, smile lingering on his lips, eyes  lost in the road “When I first saw everything, met this world… First time I met those people you saw back there…Shit, man” he turns to give me knowing look “I was just like you, you know”- oh!

To hell with that!

“Ya’ ain’t like me” I snap, sudden anger hitting me at the combination of his words. Something triggered me, can’t tell if it’s because of the drug or whatever he’s implied, but fuck it, I’m nothing like this pretentious prick!

I mean, just look at him! All baby smooth pale skin, flowery smelling hair, slender graceful fingers…

A wave of anger strikes me again.

“Ain’t nothin’ like ya’, ya’ hear me?” fully turning towards him, I grab the seat for support “Ain’t some spoiled rich brat who knows shit ‘bout life, ain’t no godamn fairy tale life ‘roun here, ya’ hear?” I slap the space between us and back away, nervously rubbing my face “… fucking hell, ain’t nothin’ like ya’” _now please, shut up_. How much time until we reach the city?

Eyes still turned to the sky outside, I wait for some reaction from him. A curse, a yell, a fist to my face – I know how to handle those things.

So I wait.

And wait.

But there’s no punch, no angry words. Though I don’t mean to, my eyes are getting pulled in his direction, just to check  what…- Hell, I look.

He’s smiling.

“Heh… You’re actually right” gentle eyes, lopsided grin, he’s still unaffectedly watching the road.

That’s weird.

 It never played out like this before.

Blinking at him, I don’t know what to say.

“But, may I read you too, Daryl?” calm as a lake, he proposes “I think it’s only fair, don’t you agree?” he quickly glances at me and takes my inability to come up with something as a yes “I assume you’re running from something, based on the information you gave me. Police? Maybe, but my guts tell me it’s more of a personal matter. Family issues, it would be my guess. If so, that’s the first thing we have in common” he glances once again at me, then slows the car down as we enter a troubled path “You don’t know how to deal with generosity very well, which makes me think it’s because you never had much of it before. How I know that? Well, I was like that once too” he intonates “You know that you liked being there, in the camp, even if you had a bad trip, you know you did, despite what you tell yourself. You liked the people, you liked the idea – or at least, you’re curious about it. I’ve been there, Daryl, and believe, the sooner you admit it to yourself, less time will be wasted… You seem very comfortable in your skin, in a way that I wasn’t when I first arrived. That keeps me wondering, actually…  Sometimes it seems like you accept yourself, other times…” I give him a hard glare that makes him look at me “What?” innocently, he’s quick to go back to his driving “ If you were a manly, thick, country, mean man like your looks tell, you wouldn’t even let me in your car in the first place. I mean, look at me, _ha_ ” he humorlessly laughs “It could be that you just happen to be an open minded person? Yes, but if that was the case, you wouldn’t have snapped at me for…” he shrugs “It’s like they say; it takes one to know one” he finishes, nonchalantly.

_Godammit._

A bump on the road makes my hair fall over my eyes, and I don’t bother to move. I feel like I’m fucking naked, if that makes any sense…

As if Jesus himself was judging me.

_I shouldn’t have said anything_

_But what did I say?_

“Uhm, hey- ” a pat on my shoulder brings me back to the moment and also makes  my head shot up. He pulls his hand away. “… be cool about it, okay?” placing his eyes again on what really matters, he adds: “I wish someone had told me: don’t overthink it, everything is alright with you, so… Don’t overthink it, cat. You’re quite alright”

“…”

Sliding back to my seat, I let my head fall back. This is tiresome.

In my mind I’m telling him to fuck off and calling it all bullshit, still…

I kinda know I’ll be thinking about what he said when I lay my head on a pillow tonight.            

“Oh… we’re getting low on gas, Daryl”

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for any English mistakes!   
> This fic is all thought out already, but I'm not really sure about it, don't know if people will enjoy this hippie 60's au, so if you're interested in it, please tell me! It would help me greatly ^^


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